Dyslexia: What Is It?

I am an average mom, who prides my self on having two average - healthy, happy - children. I never wanted my kids to have the stress of being the top of the class, and I always try to encourage them to stop and smell the roses - something I, myself, am not very good at.

When the preschool teachers told me my son was having difficulty with academic tasks like copying from the board or drawing certain figures, I had the same response as I did when they told me my daughter was off the charts in language skills, "How are they at making friends?" That is all I wanted to know. As the years have passed, both of my children have been happy, mostly-adjusted, well behaved children; but, it always seemed that my son was working a little harder at everything.

Being a teacher of 14 years, I have seen children struggle, and then succeed - and succeed and then struggle - so I didn't worry about Aiden too much. My husband and I would diligently help him work through difficult assignments and he was generally able to keep A's and B's in school.

About second grade, I noticed that his letter reversals were not going away. I casually mentioned it to the pediatrician who asked that we keep an eye on it - not a huge deal.

In third grade, when we went for his check up, the pediatrician - being the awesome doctor that he is - asked about the reversals. When I told him that they were still occurring, he suggested that we talk to the school corporation about an academic evaluation. Of course I blurted out, "NO," and then went on to calmly explain that Aiden had good grades in school and seemed to be doing fine, other than the reversals. (I failed to mention to the doctor that I had begun to notice Aiden reversing, not only letters, but words. For example, if he were to read the word VERY, it would most likely come out as EVER, and NEVER was always EVEN.)

During the fourth grade pediatrician visit, I was still in denial. The doctor questioned the reversals and once again suggested testing. This time, I was a little more thought out. I have a background in elementary special education , so I am well aware that dyslexia is not considered a disability in Indiana schools. I also thought thatin order to get services, he would need to qualify as learning disabled. Learning disabled Aiden is NOT. He will sit for hours explaining the Theory of Relativity, how dust came to be, all major and many miner contributors to American and World History, and the child has a better grasp of Theology than most adults. There was no way with good conscious I could ask for him to be tested. Then the pediatrician, seeing what I refused to see, suggested that Aiden visit a specialized psychologist. "No, thank you. He is doing fine," was really all I could come up with. At the same time, my son started a conversation with his doctor about how he sees things that aren't there and they move when he goes to touch them. No wonder the doctor wanted him to see a psychologist!!! I was so embarrassed, I shushed my son, saying "Quit being such a hypochondriac," and as quickly as possible we left the doctor's office.

Two days later, I was at an evening graduate class, when I overheard a side conversation coming from a group of classmates. One of them, Kay, who I have been in many classes with and has always freely discussed her struggles and triumphs with Dyslexia, was explaining to the others, "Those people would always get so frustrated with me! They would say I was being lazy when I didn't read those little words, and so I just got frustrated right back and told them, 'I can read those big words - they're not the problem. It's just those little words - they disappear and I just can't see them."

I didn't say a word. I just sat. My jaw hanging open. And listened. I was no longer listening to Kay and her sidebar conversation. All I could hear was a replay in my head of the many nights that in frustration I would shout at my son, "Aiden! Quit being so darn LAZY!! If you can read all those big words, you can read the LITTLE WORDS!" Over and over and over it played through my head!

When I got home that evening, the children already in bed, I told my husband about the doctors visit, and about the conversation I had overheard. He just kind of laughed as he Googled dyslexia.

One of the first sights we came across was a list of something like 42 characteristics of Dyslexia. We were about half way down the list, when I stopped, put my head in my hands and sobbed.

SEES NON-EXISTENT MOVING OBJECTS

I shushed my son. He was tring to give important infomation to the doctor and I SHUSHED HIM! Not only was I a terrible mother for not seeing this earlier, I pretty much told him to shut up. Wow! I don't think I will ever get over the shock of reading that characteristic on the list. By the time the list was done, we decided Aiden met about 39 of the 42 characteristics.

The next site we looked out was an online evaluation to decide if you should consult a physician. We took the test which rated Aiden in something like six different areas. At the end of the evaluation it would compile your responses for each area and if it rated you between moderate to severe in two or more areas you should seek professional assistance. Aiden was between moderate to severe in all 8 areas. Six of the areas were severe. That was all I could take. We did not look at any more sites that night or since.

The next morning, at breakfast, I began the conversation. I said, "Aiden, I need to apologize to you. The other day, when we were in the doctor's office, you tried to tell the doctor something, and I told you to shush. I wasn't being a very good listener, but I am ready to listen now. What were you going to say about seeing things?" He went on to explain that he sees letters floating in the air. Sometimes they are A's or B's, but they are always red, and he can never touch them."

My husband and I made an apology appointment with the pediatrician that same day. The next day we met with the school staff who were not surprised and were very supportive. Aiden was given a 504 which is much like an Special Education IEP (Individualized Education Plan) without qualifying for special services.

Now, four months later, life is much better. Aiden is able to verbalize what is causing him difficulty, and since we are now listening, his needs are being better met. I have gotten a few tips from friends with experience. My favorite is the colored transparency strips. We used to plug our ears when Aiden would read aloud, and now, when he reads through a colored transparency strip, it sounds so good I really just want to cry. We are no longer up until midnight doing homework, and he actually says he loves to read now - I NEVER thought I'd hear him say that.

So, why share this in a BLOG? Well, for one, I am realizing that it is therapeutic. It feels good to think through the experience, that for so long, I didn't want to think about. I am not scared of my son having Dyslexia anymore. Now, I am ready for the next step. The problem is, I am not sure what the next step is. I truly do not know what Dyslexia is? How my son got it? Or, anything about it.

That is the reason for this BLOG. I need to know, where do I go from here? I want to investigate Dyslexia, what it is, and how it relates to my son's life. I don't want to be in denial anymore.